Things to do at 3 am

October 10, 2007 by enchantingsunshine.

Here’s a post I wrote earlier in the week. Since I’m feeling too charitable towards my coworkers to make fun of them at the moment, I’ll go ahead and post Saturday’s entry.

Let’s say you’ve had another one of those sleepless nights and are searching for something to do. You’d like to read, but you’re too tired to think coherently, but oddly enough, not to sleep, which if your circadian rhythm wasn’t so screwed up, you’d be doing. So, instead, you must find an activity that doesn’t require too much brain power, yet effectively takes your mind off of how much you’d rather be sleeping. Here are some suggestions from the voice of experience:

1) Search for yourself on the Internet. Discover that no one will ever find your blog, which I suppose is a good thing since you can continue to make fun of the people with whom you work with impunity. There’s a silver lining to every cloud.
2) Watch the Daily Show on the Internet upstairs so that you don’t disturb your husband who is sleeping soundly, even if you are jealous. Friday’s episode was particularly good.
3) Update Itunes. Note that the number of podcasts is over 2000. Ponder deleting some to free up hard drive space but reconsider with hopes that a prolonged illness will allow you plenty of bed rest to enjoy all 2000 episodes.
4) Finish bag of Candy Corns bought impulsively on recent vacation. Wonder again at how they’re made. Research on Internet. Feel embarrassed that the answer was so obvious.
5) Consider filing all those papers in the office so it’s one less thing to do tomorrow. Dismiss idea as rash.
6) Surf through entire Car Talk website. Page through every picture in their photo album. Upload picture of self in front of Car Talk Plaza door. Keep checking back compulsively to see if picture was added.
7) Bore the five loyal readers you do have making a list of things to do, just to kill time until sunrise.
8 ) Wonder why it’s so hot on October 7. Chortle derisively at people who don’t believe in global warming. Imagine them being swept away in a flood before they reproduce and add more inferior offspring to the world’s vast population.
9) Decide to do filing after all. Sigh.
10) Start playing podcasts in hopes of catching up, one hour at a time.
11) Wonder why all spontaneously created lists settle at ten items. Create another just to add chaos to the universe.

Take that universe.

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